Post-Op Appointments

This blog post is about more than the post-operative appointments last Tuesday…This was the worst traffic we have endured in one day and of course, I was behind the wheel which I don’t like to drive anyway. The first appointment was scheduled at 10:00 at the plastic surgeon’s office. We were a little behind but still had two hours to make it in time. We got about 20 miles on I-95 and came to a complete stop, then slowly became stop and go traffic that lasted roughly 45 minutes. We knew we would be late for the appointment and notified the office.

We arrived almost an hour late and then had to wait another hour to be seen, urg I’m not a patient person. I get it, we were late and I was just happy that Todd was still able to be seen that day! The physician’s assistant came in to examine the incision and address some issues. The incision is healing nicely so far and the swelling and tightness should subside. However, he is outputting more fluid than expected by now and also shows some fluid swelling down his side. Because of this, he needed to wear a wrap-around his chest like a tube top, we joked, until next week for another follow up appointment. Potentially then they could remove the stitches and drain tube. Last Monday, Todd noticed some swelling in his ankles more on the left, not typical with this surgery but was just told to keep an eye on and may need an ultrasound if it continues. He was also prescribed a different pain medication which didn’t work too well.

As we went to get in the car, there was a ticket in the window. I honestly thought that it was because I was pulled up to far in the parallel parking spot. Nope, it was a violation for not paying the parking meter. Yes, there was parking meter unlike any other meter I have ever seen, not that I have seen a whole lot because we do not have them in our city. This thing looked like an electric car charger to me, there should be a big sign “parking meter”. As we navigated our way to eat lunch on the highway, Todd tried to warn me about a big piece of debris in the road, this big round piece of wood or metal. I was about to switch lanes and did not have time to completely bypass it, so I ran over some of it thankfully without any damage.

Right after that, we got a call from the next doctor’s office asking if we could come in earlier. By that time we were a little bit away and about to eat lunch so we ate and made our way back to the Orlando Health medical area. Believe it or not, we were about to get off the exit and I saw the same big object as earlier fly up from the car in front of me and I’m not even sure what exactly happened next because it was so fast. The car literally jumped and I made my way to the shoulder. The front of the car had been hit and there was stuff hanging all underneath. There was a big piece of curled up plastic that we assumed came from a different car that hit this massive circle. Since we were ok and the car was running, I turned on the hazard lights and dragged down the road, got off the exit and into the parking garage. We had to make it to this appointment, it’s not like we were in town or it was an easy reschedule kind of thing. The people staring was as if we were unaware of what was going on and all I could do was laugh.

Once we checked into the appointment, which by the way we were on (original) time for, we sat in the office for almost an hour. I decided to finally call our insurance company for an attempt to figure out what to do. I even said out loud “EVERYTHING IS FIGUREOUTABLE” by Marie Forleo, three times after the incident. Luck would have it that the doctor came in the room as I was in the middle of filing the claim so I missed a lot of what was said. The insurance agent that filed the claim stated that my next step would be to talk with the claim representative and I needed to wait for them to contact me… It turns out my insurance will not cover anything, but that is a whole nother story.

When I got off the phone, the surgical oncologist did a recap. The good news of the day is that the dissection removed 25 lymph nodes and there were only 4 positive of metastatic melanoma. He also believes that once the stitches are removed the tightness will loosen up. The next standard of care steps is to consult with a radiation oncologist and also discuss treatment options. Also, we have not heard the results for the BRAF testing yet. This doctor knows and understands Todd’s history and let us know that these were the recommendations and that just because he was suggesting them, Todd did not have to do them. A great feeling to have an understanding doctor that actually listens to his patient’s needs and wants. Now as far as what the actual decision will be, I am unsure of and giving Todd his time to think about it. The doctor did not mention another PET scan, however, we know that one will be required in the future to verify no spread of disease. Although, our belief is that it is gone and Todd is doing the best he can now to prevent any spreading or reoccurrence. Side note, we later broke down the pathology report that indicated that there were also 3 separate lymph nodes that were removed from the axilla level 3 area which is located further inward towards the clavicle and they were also negative for cancer. The mobility of Todd’s arm at the shoulder is extremely tight and he will likely need some physical therapy. Overall great news from both of the appointments.

We left the parking garage from the forth level, by the way, was the furthest we have had to climb, dragging the whole way down in the search for the nearest mechanic. Luckily after the GPS failed us we found one. They lifted the car and showed us what it really looked like. The bar holding the radiator was bent leaving the radiator hanging but surprisingly not damaged. The main computer box hanging, making us wonder how it was still working. That plastic piece that was on the side of the road was my front driverside inner wheel liner, it had come completely off. The oil filter can was dented but not punctured. The guys at the shop were kind enough to zip tie the falling pieces up securely to make it home free of charge. The car and the two of us were extremely lucky!

By the time we got home, it was nearly 8:00 what a long exhausting day full of bad luck or whatever you want to call it because at this point I didn’t know what to say or what to think. Frustration, aggravation, guilt, blame, pity and any other negative words came to mind. What was really going on with this day, why was it so fucked up? We kept asking ourselves, was it yet another constant reminder that things could always be worse? Because trust me we are fully aware of that and I have been striving every day to start it with gratitude. All I’m asking for is a break! I hate having drama, I hate having (understandable) “excuses” to not go somewhere, I hate feeling inadequate, I hate that everything has seemed to revolve around the negatives in our lives, I hate that people feel sorry for us (I’m thankful but I still don’t like it), I hate that people assume that our lives just completely suck right now and so on…Which by the way they don’t but some days definitely do! My apologies for my rant, that is all (for now). And a huge shout out to all of those that understand our situation for what it really is, we appreciate you 🥰

So every week I choose a quote from my Monday motivations to write on my bathroom mirror with a dry erase marker. Sometimes they stay up longer than their allotted time because they are that inspiring. That night when I got out of the shower the words on the mirror answered my thoughts it said, “Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations” and I’m like damn right it does. I know that we are on this journey to get to a better place and I have an abundance of faith that we will arrive there exactly where we are supposed to be.

Since I didn’t get my editing done last week, here is how the follow up went today:

I didn’t trust driving my temporarily fixed car back to Orlando and we are down to one vehicle, we rented a car for the day and made our drive arriving on time. But what better way to start a Monday than at the doctor’s office right? A different PA came in to check the site and the bubbled area under the armpit appears to be infected, the drainage tube could not be removed hoping to catch the infected fluid. The stitches at the top around the swollen area have to stay for now too, just the lower ones were taken out. He will need to keep it wrapped another week for as much as possible because it bothered him too much the last week to keep on. Todd did start taking the Percocet again because he has been in pain without much relief and they have not given him a migraine again, maybe it was the combination of everything in his system right after surgery? Either way, I’m glad he has some left to ease the pain. We have to return back next week and hopes, prayers and fingers crossed that the remaining stitches and tube can finally be removed.

Recovering from somewhat of major surgery has been tough and exhausting. If I feel drained physically and emotionally, I can only imagine how Todd must feel. It is hard for us both to be on the same positive page but we are not superhuman robots and both very aware of our emotions, good quality if you ask me, but you know we feel deeply and that can be difficult.

As always thank you all for your love and support 🙏❤️

https://www.gofundme.com/manage/todds-stage-4-cancer-journey